On America and stuff

Jeeze, I haven't updated this jawn in forever. Mostly because I haven't really been doing anything since the Pesach break. I guess I've had some schoolwork, but I haven't been doing too much of that either. I know it's a cliche, but I literally have no idea where the time has gone. It feels like maybe two weeks ago that I took that sharoute ride from the airport to the University for the first time, and now the semester is almost over.

I think being here has been really good for me. I have a much better conception now than I had when I first got here of what is important to me. I've been around a lot of people who are radically different from people I would be with at Simon's Rock, which has been important to my development, I think. I forgot what it was like to be around with people who are so ideologically/intellectually/emotionally/etc. different from me. I think I have a much clearer idea now of who I am, which is probably also a cliche, but I don't care.

I've been thinking a lot lately about American identity and what being an American is. I've spent quite a bit of time abroad by now, all over the world, but before coming to Israel, I rarely thought about my conception of the United States and how having been born there has informed my decisions and my personality. There are things about living in the U.S. that I never appreciated until being away from it for so long. I know that America is a very flawed place in many ways, but I no longer feel like I have to hate living there or resent being an American in order to be cultured or worldly or interesting. This is truly a progression for me, as I am a person who has a lot of liberal guilt and thinks a lot about how much better the country would be if I ran it. But now I can see it for its benefits, too. Anyway, after having been here and been thinking about this for so long, I've decided I want to pursue a more active interest in changing things back home as best I can. So I got a canvassing job in DC for the summer--saving the country, one doorbell at a time. It's better than nothing.

I've also been interested in documenting cultural differences. I mean, in many ways, Israel is very Westernized, and, in many ways, it isn't at all. I am taking this class called Psychology of Conflict Resolution (I think I've discussed it on here before), which in some ways is a load of shit and, in other ways, is by far the most interesting class I've taken here. I see examples of what we learn about in class every day, embedded almost imperceptibly in the culture here. What I may have thought of as rude or un-American when I first got here, I now see as beautiful indicators of a different mindset that is incredibly complex and difficult to understand as a foreigner. Of course, the class leaves a lot of infuriatingly complex questions that are pretty much impossible to answer. For example, we spend a lot of time discussing the vast differences between individual and collective mindsets, but we never talk about the genesis of these divergent mindsets. I want to know where the difference really is--whether it's in the actual thoughts of the individuals, or whether it's just an affectation picked up by societal norms which dictate the way people should behave. It's hard to say, and the professor can't answer it.

Anyway, I'm going to Germany this week to visit Lisa, and, before that, I'll be spending time in Tel Aviv with Mindy. So things are really only looking up from here on out. I will update about Germany, I'm sure.